I’m a PBS watcher, and NPR listener, and a National Geographic reader.
A reason I prefer nerd media is that popular media so often presents sexuality in a way that either objectifies women, reinforces dangerous stereotypes, is factually incorrect, or just totally misses the point of sex. PBS in particular does a darn good job of presenting sexuality in a mostly (*mostly*) healthful, accurate way.
I was disappointed with National Geographic’s Taboo. It tried – I could see it trying – to be sciencey. Debunking myths. Embracing cultural relativity. Interviewing people who genuinely know what the fuck they’re talking about. These are good things.
And yet. Notice the music? Notice the timbre of the narrator’s voice? I imagine a roomful of producers and technicians and conversations like, “This anthropology is all very well, but make it… I don’t know… taboo!!” Because sex in the context of non-monogamous relationships isn’t sufficiently interesting unless the narrator leers and salivates.
I have a similar feeling about HBO’s “Real Sex.” Surely there’s a way to present various kinks without making anyone seem ridiculous and without flashing images of naked sweaty women. Surely there is a way to present sexuality in the media in a way that isn’t stupid, degrading, deliberately provocative, or prurient.
I’ll let you know when I find it. And you let me know when YOU find it!
emily nagoski
3 Responses to “sex, taboo, culture, media”
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I think the problem, from an entertainment point of view, is many people actually *think* of sex as degrading, deliberately provocative, or prurient. If you present sex in an academic or even just healthy way, they won’t recognize it unless you also take time to tell them, “I know you think it’s this, but it turns out…” at which point it’s no longer very entertaining. And even then, if their paradigm includes provocative prurience, they’ll even see the healthy academic stuff as lurid.
Well, have fun overcoming puritanism.
Agreed, REAL SEX looks good but every episode is like three factoids wrapped in thirty minutes of disappointment. Turning me on to what used to be and now isn’t, an interesting web personals site nine years ago, was the best thing that show has ever accomplished.
This is something I’ve been grappling with for some time. Most of my personal projects are motivated by trying to find different ways of packaging sexuality information that is not stupid. See, for instance, Male Submission Art. See also Kink On Tap.
All told, I think the lesson I’ve learned is this: it is not good enough to merely look for media that doesn’t present sexuality in a stupid, racist, classist, sexist, or adultist way. Instead, you have to make media that deals with the subject matter with respect. Don’t just critique the media, become the media.
At least, that’s what I’m trying to do.