bend it like Beckett

Here is a handjob tip that causes people’s eyes to widen and their heads to tilt thoughtfully to one side.

As I’ve mentioned before, the shaft of the penis extends deep inside a man’s body. Much can be done with this fact.

So why not do this: once he’s got his erection, lay him on his back, lube up your hands, and start the clock. What I mean is, using upward strokes and alternating hands (right, left, right, left), point his cock toward his chin. Bend it right down so it’s nearly parallel to his body.

Then rotate, point it toward his shoulder (right, left, right left – go slow, be fairly firm),

then toward his hip bone (right left…), there you go, well done,

then to a 90° angle, toward his hip, then down toward his thigh, then straight down toward his feet, and around again up the other side.

Like his body is a clock face and you’re rotating the “big hand” around 12 hours. Gradually. With upward (as in, from base of penis to head of penis) strokes, alternating hands. And plenty of lube.

Feel free to include some wrist-twisting, if you feel it’s appropriate.

What this does is bend the shaft where it meets his body. This feels very interesting and good. You may notice that he’s particularly sensitive or responsive pointing in one direction or another. Tuck that information away for future use.

A slightly advanced technique, for those who feel they’ve mastered the basics: don’t grip the shaft in your fist, like you’re gonna lead a marching band with it; instead, allow the palm of your hand, your thenar eminence to be the primary source of contact, and curl your palm around the head of the penis, just resting your fingertips over the frenulum, which is exquisitely sensitive to light touch. While’s he’s rotated toward your right, it’s the right hand you’ll do this with; toward your left, your left hand. But you’re alternating hands, yeah, so when your opposite hand strokes upward, it’ll be an entirely different sensation – with the palm of your hand against the frenulum instead.

When you’re using this technique, use the hand that’s not stroking to press the shaft, near the base of the penis, in the desired direction. The combined sensation of the deep-touch bending and the light-touch stroking is very lovely and fine.

You can also try using your hands and your mouth. It’s a particularly excellent strategy for folks interested in preventing choking: you vastly decrease the risk of accidentally getting him too close to the back of your throat if he’s not pointing out, perpendicular to his body, but rather pointing down to his toes or flat against his belly or over to one side.

A further benefit of the “pointing toward his toes” position is that you can look up at him quite easily. Which is a pleasant and friendly-like thing to do.

So there’s a little something for you, to make your weekend move along with a bit of a swing.

(What has this got to do with Beckett? Well. If you do it right, it’ll seem surreal, and also he’ll feel like he’s about to meet Jesus. But mostly I just thought it was an entertaining [if elitist] title.)